Let Go and Stay Calm: Don’t Waste Energy on What You Can’t Control

Life is full of unexpected twists – traffic jams, delayed flights, long queues – we all face daily frustrations. But how often do we find ourselves getting worked up over things we simply cannot change?

I recently experienced this firsthand on my birthday. My 5:35 PM flight was delayed until 8:30 PM, landing me home well after midnight. Hardly the birthday celebration I envisioned! But instead of succumbing to frustration, I reframed the situation. I used the unexpected downtime to return calls and birthday messages, tasks that would have otherwise taken days. This unexpected delay turned into a productive opportunity.

Angry man in traffic

How Stress Hijacks the  Brain and Drains Our Energy

Prefrontal cortex and Amyglada

 

When we get stuck in frustration over things we can’t control, our brain reacts as if we’re facing a real threat. The amygdala, the part of our brain responsible for processing emotions like fear and frustration, goes into overdrive. This activates our body’s stress response, flooding us with cortisol and adrenaline.

In small doses, this response is helpful—it keeps us alert in emergencies. But when we stress over things beyond our control, this constant activation exhausts our system. It drains our mental, emotional, and even physical energy, leaving us feeling depleted, irritable, and unable to focus on what truly matters.

Meanwhile, our prefrontal cortex—the part of the brain responsible for rational thinking, decision-making, and problem-solving—gets suppressed. This makes it harder to think clearly, regulate our emotions, or find solutions, leading us to feel even more frustrated. It’s a cycle that wastes both our time and our energy.



Reclaiming Your Energy: The Power of Mindset Shift

STRESS FREE

 

The good news? We have the power to break the cycle. By consciously shifting our focus away from what we can’t control to what we can, we send a signal to the brain that there is no real threat. This calms the amygdala, re-engages the prefrontal cortex, and stops unnecessary energy leaks.

This experience highlighted a crucial point: worrying about things we can’t control is a massive energy drain. It’s like a slow leak in your emotional gas tank. We all have moments where we throw our energy at things beyond our control – complaining, stressing, or feeling stuck in frustration. When we get stuck in frustration, our brains react as if we’re facing a genuine threat. This is where the science of stress comes in. 

The truth is, our energy is precious. When we focus on what we can control – our mindset, our reactions, and how we use the time – we gain a sense of calm and clarity. We have the power to break the cycle. By consciously shifting our focus away from what we can’t control to what we can, we send a signal to the brain that there is no real threat. This calms the amygdala, re-engages the prefrontal cortex, and stops unnecessary energy leaks.

Next time you’re in a situation that feels out of your hands, ask yourself:

  • Is this something I can change?
  • If not, how can I make the most of it?
  • Where is my energy best spent right now?

Think of your energy like a battery—you wouldn’t waste it on things that give you nothing in return. So why waste it on frustration? Instead, choose to invest your energy wisely, in things that uplift, empower, and move you forward.

To wrap up, I’d like to point you to Mel Robbins and her “Let Them Theory,” which emphasizes the importance of focusing on our own reactions and things that you can control, rather than trying to control others or worrying about things that are not within your control. Mel Robbins is a renowned motivational speaker, author, and podcast host known for her practical, science-backed tools to help people improve their lives. For a deeper dive into the “Let Them Theory” and more of Mel Robbins’ insights, you can explore her books, such as “The 5 Second Rule” and “The High 5 Habit,” or listen to “The Mel Robbins Podcast.” She is also on all Social Media Platforms. 

Here’s to reclaiming your energy and focusing on what truly matters by embracing the power of a mindset shift!





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